When God made man, all the parts of the body argued over who would be boss. The brain explained that since he controlled all the parts of the body, he should be boss. The legs argued that since they took the man wherever he wanted to go, they should be boss.
The stomach countered with explanation that since he digested all the food, he should be boss. The eyes said that without them, man would be helpless, so they should be boss. Then the asshole applied for the job. The other parts of the body laughed so hard that the asshole become mad and closed up. After a few days the brain went foggy, the legs got wobby, the stomach got ill, thr eyes got crossed and unable to see. They all cenceded and made the asshole boss. This proves that you dont’ have to be a brain to be boss…. just an asshole.
“Oh no, it’s my husband!”, she said to her boyfriend on hearing the front door slam. “Quick hide in the wardrobe!”
He grabbed his clothes and dashed from the bed to the wardrobe. After a few minutes, another voice said quietly, “It’s damn dark in here, isn’t it?”
The man, shivering in the nude, said, “Who’s there?”
The little voice replied, “Give me $50 and I won’t yell out to Dad and tell him who you are.”
In no position to argue, he handed over the money, and at the appropriate time made a quick dash out the window.
The following week, Junior came home with a brand new set of roller blades. His mother queried, “Where did you get the money for those?”
“I had $50″, he replied.
“Where did you get that kind of money?”, but Junior wasn’t telling.
Convinced her son was up to no good, she ordered him to go to Church. “Confession will fix you up, my boy. You’ll have to tell the Priest”, and she pushed him into the confessional box and shut the door.
“It’s damn dark in here”, he said out loud.
“Now, don’t start that again!”, said the Priest.