You know the feeling. Hell we all know the feeling at one point or another in our lives. Did she just fake that orgasm? Did she fake it so I would stop? Did she fake it to make me feel better? Is she tired? Is she tired of ME? What the hell is going on around here?! Or the ever oblivious superstar who has never had a woman fake it. He always succeeds. Poor uninformed soul. Have you ever wondered if she just faked that orgasm? Well unfortunately for you, you may never know. Let it go.
I have read many blogs/reports/studies that give a percentage of women that fake an orgasm, and it has varied from 35% to 85%. So I won’t quote any one source, or give you an exact number, but you can be assured, that most men have or will encounter a woman who fakes orgasms. Now for the surprising part, as many as 30% of men have been reported to fake an orgasm as well.
Why fake it? Well some of the most common responses given to psychcentral.com were:
- Orgasm was unlikely: Whether it be mood, drugs, or alcohol…sometimes, it just don’t happen.
- To get it over with: Maybe their partner has gotten off, and want to keep going til they get off too.
- Avoid conflict or negative consequences: Basically meaning they don’t want to hurt someone else’s feelings, by not getting off.
- Wanted to please partner: Aka – Ego Stroke.
I have been in a situation in the past when I just wanted it to end. I wasn’t feeling it, she had gotten off, and we were just going through the motions. I had been drinking, and just knew it wasn’t going to happen. She also made it known that she thought she was the best anyone had ever had. So I faked it. She wouldn’t know, just trash the condom after and call it a night. Everything went off without a hitch, she went home ego in tact, and I got to go to bed. Sometimes it just don’t happen.
One of the biggest reasons I have found by talking to people, and in my situation alike, it is mostly…just to be nice. People think they are superstars of sex, or sometimes, there is the opposite feeling of “unworthiness” if you don’t get off. It seems, honestly to me, that women are more likely than men to think it was their fault their partners didn’t orgasm.
While it is perfectly acceptable to fake an orgasm from time to time for whatever reason, DO NOT make it a staple in your life. If you fake an orgasm every time you and your spouse make love, you will be faking it for the rest of your life. Be vocal about what gets you going. Let the other half know what else can be done to push you over the edge. Don’t get stuck in a lackluster relationship because you wanted to be nice.
Just know, guys and gals alike, all the studies have shown that when an orgasm is faked it is to benefit YOU. If someone didn’t give a shit about you, they wouldn’t care how you felt after sex. They wouldn’t care if you got off, and sure as hell wouldn’t care enough to make you think they did as well. If you ever feel like she faked it (or he), try harder next time. Go that extra mile, whether it be orally or including toys in playtime. Just remember, they do care about you, and they just showed it!
Have you ever faked an orgasm? If so let us know in the comments below why!